Hemorrage in my head

As I plan this
Everlasting moment
For the 2 of us
The onlooker finds you
Walking onto a plane
Full of forgotten pasts
And new, better beginnings.

The window looks so pale,
Could that be your face
From the alcohol that
Runs your veins at such a time
This early morning?
I believe that your window
Is foggy and clouded
From judgments long forgotten
And it is now time you
Take a step back as they fall
Into your life again.

Don't destroy me with your
Short whims and
Lofty cries, of how
You really do like this
Sentiment that I pour from my heart.
When really your as lost
As sailor with no stars.
Shipwrecked and turned around,
No map to save you
From your own desires
And own decisions.

So I'll place my heart
Upon the table of butchers
Where this piece of meat
Can then either be taken
And tenderized or
Sliced for all the hungry mouths to feed........
Upon the emotions with which
I pour from the darkest, deepest recesses
Of my innner being. 

So I'm driving along.......and

I pooped my pants.

Now the question is, is does this run in my household?

Lighting a cigarette,
The man arises to another day.
His most hated enemy shows his face
And as monotony sets in
He looks out his window.
As usual he views the ever-forboding
BATTLE SYSTEM.

Alive and moving in all directions.
Another pull from his lungs
Another heated smoky breathe expires and
Befalls his morning journey through life.

A walk to the cupboard,
Glass in hand
Bottle retrieved
Glass filled....and emptied.

His enemy shall not overcome him.
This battle  system will not suck him dry.
Another flick,
A spark of flint
The end burns and the breathes go down painlessly.

It is the beginning

Of the end.

okay.......So I"m back and better than ever.

Anyone who knows me should know that.  Thinking about music.  The old band broke up, so I'm trying to figure out what to do.  Till then I"ll be working 2 jobs.

My Shed-yule:

Monday : Head to work at 7:18 am.  Get home at around 10 am......maybe sleep maybe doing something like watch a movie.  Probably sleep.

Tuesday : Wake up at 12 am and go to work by 1 am.  Get off work between 6:30 and 7 am and head to second job.  Get home around 10 am and go to bed.  Get up at 2 pm and go to work till either 6 or 7 pm.  Stay up and go to work that next morning at 1 am.

Wednesday : Be at work by 1 am.  Get off at around 10 am form second job.  Slepp rest fo day till next day of work.

Thursday : Exactly the same as Tuesday.

Friday : Get to work by 1 am and get off at aorund 10 am from second job.  Go home and catch up on sleep.  Dream about working......bah.

Saturday : Go to work by 1 am, get home by 7:17 am and go to bed.  Get up around 8 pm and find someone to hangout with.  Maybe go drink some beer by 8:22 pm.....maybe start movie and wait for friend to come over by 8:12 pm. (Who knows) 

Sunday : Go to bed around 4:30 am from Satrudays hangout times.  Wake up from both alarms at 10:30 am and realize I am not going to church again this week.  Go back to bed by 10:30:12.  Wake up at around 6 or 7 pm and call someone to hangout.  Hangout till whenever...and then stay up the rest of the night till work Monday morning at 7:45 am.

Someone call me and talk to me, I"m really depressed about the usual.  A woman thing.  Just one and she knows who she is.

j ' taime

So this will be the last post.  The final sha-bang!  The finale.....of this xanga.  Will I be getting another one.  No.  At least not anytime soon.  You might ask why?  Here are my feelings on it.

Though xanga is a great way to write about your life....not only so other people can keep up with your daily happenings, but also so you yourself can go back an remember things about your life, one day when your older and things need remembered........xanga is also somethign that people take way to seriously.

I say this because of comments I've recieved and comments I've seen other people recieve.....and because of the way I"ve seen people act towards comments they recieve.

My xanga has hurt people I know, made them cry, made them laugh, and probably made a lot of people bored.  I don't want to do that to anyone anymore.  I don't want to get caught up in some xanga fight about how I left a comment and it said this, when it was really a joke, and I didn't intend for anyone's feelings to be hurt.  I do have a myspace page if you wanna keep up with me.  I'll try to re-update that every so often.  Probably about once a week.

www.myspace.com/8893803

I love you all so very much, but it's time to move away from this. :(

I love you.  I miss my heart.